Our Story?

The story of us.

It reads so eloquently. Romantic, almost.

We’ve been married for 15 years and we’ve had our fair share of not-Pinterest-worthy moments. But they’re all part of the story, right? So how, as we continue along on this rocky road called life – and marriage, singledom, divorce, widowhood….. – how do we share ‘the story of us’?

And what about the famous highlight reels: Instagram, Pinterest and Facebook? Is it ok to just share the best bits? Or is that dishonest? Should we be sharing pics of a messy house sometimes? Or selfies on a tough day? Cos honestly, I just wanna share the highlight reel, when the ‘real’ is too messy.

What is the story of us? And what is safe to share? My least favourite thing about parties is the part of the conversation where they start asking me questions…. I love asking questions and learning about someone else… but I really don’t like it when the tables turn. How do I answer the questions when each one seems to open up a pandora’s box? I’m so worried about over-sharing that I end up under-sharing and closing people out of my life.

The purpose of this post is to open the conversation. I want to know how you do it.

I was at a wedding on the weekend – check out the STUNNING photos – and met a guy (whose name is Guy) – who told me up front that he likes to ask a lot of questions. (Hmmm, I thought – I wonder if you can rival my ridiculous penchant for asking questions) – his solution was this – “I’ll give you three skip buttons!” he said. “If I ask you a question you don’t want to answer, you can press skip – but only three times!” It was hilarious and fun and it actually worked. He was more comfortable asking questions and I was more comfortable answering them – because I had an out.

What about you? How do you get around answering questions you don’t want to answer? How do you tell ‘the story of us’, whatever that may look like for you?

Are highlight reels ok, or should we swap them for real?

I wanna know!


2 Comments Add yours

  1. Deb says:

    Hi Joni,
    I guess I am more inclined to post the photos that show the happy times on Instagram and Facebook because I figure we can focus on the negative or the positive things in our life, and so by posting the happy pics, I am choosing to focus on the positives. It’s true that life is not always happy, but posting the unhappy pics could be incriminating to others, and I don’t want to embarrass them. Perhaps it would be helpful for others to see unflattering selfies or messy home pics though. :)

    I like the idea of having buttons and giving people a choice to pass on answering questions. I often play a game with others where I see how long I can keep them talking about themselves. My experience has been that most people like to talk about themselves, and I figure if someone really wants to “know me”, they will ask the questions. Most don’t and I am happy not to talk about myself unless someone really wants to know. In saying that, I do appreciate the friend who genuinely asks “What’s been happening with you, Deb?”

    I love the things you write and I look forward to what you will say next in this conversation on sharing our stories. There is a part of me that really wants to share my story and a part that is afraid to. I guess so far, I have tried to be led by the Holy Spirit in sharing only with those who would benefit from hearing something of my journey.

    Bless you in your sharing. xo


    1. Thanks for your beautiful words Deb, I have never forgotten those times when you shared parts of our story with me….I was always so encouraged by you x


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